I have been writing this post for the past month. I haven't been able to finish because of time or clarity or well... having a new baby... I never expected to feel so fulfilled, loved and in love all at one time with the arrival of our sweet boy. My home is bursting at the seams with love. Unconditional love from my husband and a whole new big sister kind of love from my daughter. The arrival of our little John boy has changed us forever, in a way we didn't know we all needed. How could something make you feel complete without ever having felt like something was missing? Yes, we are tired. I am getting over the flu. My house is not clean and our meals are more like a smorgasbord, but I am ok with it. I'm ok with it now because last time around I had higher expectations of myself which led to guilt and unhappiness. I am consciously trying to cut myself some slack even compliment myself even when I can hardly think of something worthy of complimenting! (Wow, you sh